Modern & Inventive Cooking? That’s So Last Week People!

 

 

Seriously? The Instant Gratification mentality sinks some more? Some it now. It doesn’t really exist. New to a specific person a dish could be. It’s not modern or inventive. Maybe superior quality ingredients, method, technology behind all the kitchen tools but not new and hardly inventive. Everything we each come in contact with may be new to us but somewhere else, someone else “Been there done that” is in the books.

Just to sidetrack a moment, why isn’t “Prepared Well” a priority for food prep when it comes to social medial and the populace outside of food service? If I was hiring someone or going somewhere that is my first and only concern. I don’t need to know your special secret ingredient that sets you apart from the culinary herd. Unless I am allergic I am not inquiring. 

Modern and Inventive is the latest catch phrase for foodies and they need to stop it. Nothing worse than the non athlete trying to think of cool nick names for pro players. It’s almost always doomed to infamy.  But NOBODY has ever used pine needles in a reduction. Right? That clever take makes for the real “black forest “.   Uh, no.  There were at least a dozen chefs in Chicago alone in the early 80’s that were experimenting with them. No doubt in my mind there had to me some dirt munching Druids before the Dark Ages experimenting deep in the forest with anything they could to keep from starving. I’ll bet Bodhmell the Druid idiot cook passed this crossroad at least once while serving up his porridge. I’ll bet he was the first to learn eating pine needles hurts at least twice………………..

I literally have the energy sapped from me when a crappy cole slaw lands on my table at lunch with a sandwich. If “Modern and Inventive” means getting something new how about a decent F–king Cole Slaw for once!!!!!!!  Warm butter with warm bread would be new in many restaurants. OK for some it would be innovative, got me there!

Molecular cooking is just an extension of the candy industry using machinery, technology, chemicals/additives both natural and not. Changing flavor, texture, color or adding variations in combinations to come up with a third variant have been going on for decades. Candy chewed into gum consistency, liquid centers, yatta yatta. The food produced with NASA technology isn’t new. The technology is new. It’s just a natural progression of food handling. Just like non stick skillets when they were first sold. Omelets didn’t really change. They were just faster to produce. For sure forks were all the rage when they first appeared.

So to all the diners and foodies please do enhance your chances for a long and healthy life and don’t ask chefs if they make modern and inventive food. It may be me you ask. Do you have any idea how long it takes an emergency room staff to remove various food groups from any UN-orthodox opening in the human body? It’s not pretty folks. Grown men cry like “Dancing Nancy Boys” over pineapples. Weren’t they a teen boy band? But I hear “pineapple stuffing” does wonders for runny noses this time of year.

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